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Who hurt you?

It was all fun and games tearing down Liverpool and Spurs, but now you’ve formed a certified superpower.

Back-to-back titles have made City a fearsome of behemoth.

Happy now?

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Happy now?

I hope you like those goals they score where one of their many obscenely expensive wingers cuts it back for Sergio Aguero to tap in from three yards because they do it seven times a week now.

You know how Bayern Munich, Juventus and PSG win their leagues around Christmas?

Well that’s what we have here.

Every game that doesn’t involve City is relatively irrelevant and every fixture from January onwards is effectively a dead rubber.

Think of the season as nothing but a long and complex guard of honour.

This City-dominated hellscape leaves you with two choices, both equally bleak…

SELL YOUR SOUL AND BECOME A CITY FAN (YOU’VE ALWAYS LIKED OASIS ANYWAY)

SACK OFF FOOTBALL AND FOCUS YOUR RESIDUAL ENERGY ON ANOTHER SPORT — I DON’T KNOW… CRICKET?