Eventually VAR technology will become self-aware and enslave us all.
But until life becomes one endless episode of Black Mirror, we might as well have a few laughs.
The M23 derby between Brighton and Crystal Palace was the first game competitive game on English soil to have video assistance available to the referee and the introduction of technology has sparked countless debates about the identity of football.
Lots of ProperFootballMen™ reckon VAR will lead to the death of the sport as we know it.
Take Jonathan Pearce for example.
Back in 2014, the BBC commentator failed to contain his mistrust of technology while calling the action between France and Honduras at the World Cup, with hilarious results.
Karim Benzema’s shot came off the inside of the post before Noel Valladares inadvertently fumbled the rebound over his own line.
Replays showed that the Frenchman’s initial effort was not a goal but the Honduran glovesman’s mistake had cost his team dearly.
For some reason, Pearce just couldn’t get his head around the situation.
Pearce’s quotes during his meltdown are still absolute gold.
“Oh goodness me, they’ve changed their minds.” – No Jonathan, they haven’t.
“Does goal-line technology work, or doesn’t it?” – You just saw it work perfectly.
“Which replay are we supposed to believe?” – Both of them, mate.
“This was supposed to be a flawless system.” – Jonathan mate, simmer down, it’s a goal.
Rather damningly, it takes Martin Keown of all people to explain the painfully obvious situation.
Pearce’s hate for technology probably stems from his days as a commentator for Robot Wars.
Watching Sir Killalot destroy all before him can really change a man.
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