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Who has the best 5-a-side team from the Premier League’s top six?

The Premier League season is over but the football goes on, so who would win in a condensed version?

The Premier League season is done and dusted, leaving a rather large football-shaped hole in our lives as we twiddle our thumbs in anticipation for next year.

But while the professionals travel to every corner of the world on their glamorous holidays, us punters continue to battle away in our weekly 5-a-side leagues.

Who fancies a stint in goal lads?

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Who fancies a stint in goal lads?

So it got us thinking.

NASCAR nascar thinking think auto club 400 GIF

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Which of the top six Premier League clubs would win in a 5-a-side competition?

We reckon, after much deliberation, they’d all line up as follows…

CHELSEA

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TOTTENHAM

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MAN CITY

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LIVERPOOL

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ARSENAL

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MAN UNITED

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OUTCOME

Selection was difficult enough, but deciding who actually boasts the beat team was even harder to pick apart.

Eventually the office decided Man City, inspired by the ridiculous midfield duo of Kevin De Bruyne and David Silva, would prevail.

Good luck seeing any of the ball with these two around

Getty Images
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Good luck seeing any of the ball with these two around

New keeper Ederson and John Stones are arguably some of the finest on the planet in their position with their feet while Gabriel Jesus’ Futsal skills make him the archetypal forward for this situation.

As for second place? Well that would have to be Spurs who, of course, ‘applied the pressure’ but to no avail.

No but seriously, the man mountain that is Mousa Dembele is apparently the best 5-a-side player in the world according to Belgian team-mate De Bruyne so good luck getting the ball off him.

Dembele is a man mountain when it comes to shielding possession

Reuters
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Dembele is a man mountain when it comes to shielding possession

Kane’s sharp shooting makes them a real goal threat but Lloris’ poor distribution means they ultimately struggle at times to build from the back.

In third are Chelsea who have a ridiculous balance between sheer endurance (something regular 5-a-siders all know is painfully lacking) in N’Golo Kante and clinical and neat footwork. A lack of a figurehead at top though may be their undoing.

Kante is known to play 10 5-a-side matches in a row

Reuters
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Kante is known to play 10 5-a-side matches in a row

Fourth? Well we have to give it to Arsenal, who got their usual spot back after falling out of the top four in the Premier League this season.

Rob Holding is rapidly developing into a John Stones 2.0 kind of figure after excelling in recent months, while Santi Cazorla’s assured presence has been a huge miss in midfield during his long injury lay-off.

Remember this guy?

Reuters
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Remember this guy?

Liverpool are fifth, neat and tidy but lacking a real killer instinct up front, while Manchester United are sixth because they prioritised other competitions.

Lovely.