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9 reasons you’ll wish you were Colombia legend Carlos Valderrama

1 He captained Colombia at three World Cups

2 And he once led them to a thumping 5-0 win over Argentina


It was a 1993 World Cup qualifier. And just look at those goalscorers.

Ay Carumba!

3 He’s best mates with him


4 And enjoys a Pina colada or two with him


5 He was always Mr Popular in Europe

Where he won a French Cup with Montpellier and played 17 times for Valladolid

6 He went to the MLS before it was cool

Carlos Valderrama Mutiny

Where he pretty much ran things for the Tampa Bay Mutiny.

7 Where they loved him so much they gave him his own national day

18 Jul 1996: Members of the Kansas City Wiz (#26 Mo Johnston, #4 Scott Uderits, #12 Digital Takawira,#6 Sean Bowers, #13 Mark Chung ) wear wigs before the Tampa Bay versus Kansas City MLS game in Tampa, Florida. They were wearing wigs that were given out to the first 1,000 fans to help celebrate Carlos Valderrama day. Valderrama is known both for his excellant soccer and very floppy hair syle. Mandatory Credit: ANDY LYONS/ALLSPORT

During which, we shit you not, players from opposition teams wore Carlos Valderrama wigs before kick-off.

His numbers there were impressive. 114 assists in 175 games to be precise. Eat that Mesut.

8 He was twice South American Player of the Year


In 1987 and 1993.

9 And finally… his hairstyle was so iconic, his own wife copied it


Just imagine how much detangler was used in that house.

VIDEO: When Valderrama made them, Asprilla normally scored them. Here’s his full story…