EUROSTAR

Here’s how Neymar’s first season at Real Madrid will pan out when he moves to Spain next summer

You can see it coming from a mile off. So how will Neymar's move to Real Madrid go down?

The date is 21 July 2018.

Six days after guiding Brazil to World Cup glory Neymar signs for Real Madrid.

It’s been coming. Months of Instagram flirting and Twitter shade made it clear Neymar wasn’t happy in Paris.

In the end there’s only so many double hat-tricks you can score against Amiens. But what happens next?


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The moment it became official

Dani Alves goes with him

It’s a well known fact that Neymar won’t go anywhere without his trusty sidekick Alves.

The shops, the cinema, PSG, Madrid. Wherever Neymar goes Alves isn’t far behind.

Madrid aren’t concerned that having Alves and Marcelo at full-backs is the equivalent of opening up a motorway for opposition wingers to use.

Florentino Perez is just happy to get another one over on Barcelona.

He’s never more than two steps behind Neymar

Neymar turns head with his squad number choice

Plans are made to sell Luka Modric back to Spurs, thus freeing up the no.10 shirt for Neymar to wear.

But the move collapses over Mousa Dembele’s refusal to move to the Bernabeu, so Madrid are left with little Luka.

Not the worst problem in the world.

Neymar decides to take the no.100 shirt instead, with his justification being that he’s ten times the player Modric (and any other no.10 in world football) is.

Ten times better than the rest

Scott Brown is signed to protect him

Seeing how Neymar was relentlessly kicked out of games during his time in France, Madrid’s chief scout is sent around the world to find a midfield protector.

He’s due to fly to England to watch Nemanja Matic and N’Golo Kante when Man United meet Chelsea, but snow grounds his flight in Glasgow.

Stuck with nothing to do he finds himself watching Celtic v Partick Thistle. So enthralled is he by Scott Brown’s performance he instantly calls back to Spain.

Three days later a slightly bemused Brown turns up at the Bernabeu, still convinced that Leigh Griffiths is playing a prank on him.

Made for Madrid

Madrid still finish 17 points behind Barcelona in La Liga

The white hankies are out in force as Madrid lag behind Barcelona for the entire league campaign.

Perez’s insistence on Zinedine Zidane playing every single galactico means Madrid often only field two defenders, one of whom is the perma-suspended Sergio Ramos.

Fine when you’re playing Eibar and Alaves, not so hot against Barca and Atletico Madrid.

We feel your pain

But still win the Champions League

Zizou survives the sack by yet again winning the Champions League.

Neymar scores home and away against PSG in the semi-final before getting the winner against RB Leipzig.

Four in a row for the Frenchman and a second Champions League medal for Neymar.

No one was surprised. In fact a record amount of Litecoin was won on the game.

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So there you have it.

Neymar’s first season at Madrid mapped out using our trusty Dream Team crystal ball.

We’ll bet you a Bitcoin it proves to be on the money.