This will undoubtedly come back to haunt us.
Come mid-July we hope a few of you will send us screenshots of this article accompanied with mocking comments along the lines of ‘you literally couldn’t have been more wrong’ or similar.
But until then, ignorance is bliss.
We’ve gazed into our crystal ball and seen the Team of the Tournament for the 2018 World Cup.
This summer will culminate in Brazil winning their sixth World Cup with the Samba style conquering the tika-taka of Spain in the final.
France and Germany make it to the semis while Uruguay, Croatia, Belgium and England are eliminated in the quarters… hang on, England? Oh, whatever, let’s just go with it.
With that in mind, here’s our prediction for Team of the Tournament…
History suggests that the winners have at least one representative in each position.
Ederson may have better feet than most midfielders but Alisson’s shot-stopping stats are on David De Gea’s level and he’s likely to be Tite’s first-choice keeper.
A penalty shootout victory for Brazil in the knockout stages will make the Roma keeper a national hero.
Marquinnhos will come of age at centre-back, effectively erasing David Luiz from the history books once and for all.
Philippe Coutinho will continue his fine form for Barcelona with an inspired showing as playmaker-in-chief for the Samba boys.
The tournament belongs to Neymar above all.
The Brazilian No10 will cement his status as the world’s best player not named Cristiano or Lionel with a tournament full of nutmegs, rainbow kicks and goals.
Golden Ball winner guaranteed.
The Golden Boot belongs to Harry Kane.
England may be dumped out on penalties to long-time tormentors Germany in the quarters, but the Spurs (soon to be Real Madrid) forward will make hay while the sun shines.
Most of his goals will come against Panama and Tunisia in the group stages, but they all count.
We’ve got Spain down as runners-up yet only Jordi Alba and Thiago Alcantara feature in the Team of the Tournament — that may be an oversight.
We’re also backing Kevin De Bruyne and Kylian Mbappe to translate their domestic form to the international stage.
Joshua Kimmich makes the cut because, well, you have to include a German don’t you?
Big Samuel Umtiti completes the set after his talismanic performances at the back for a hot-and-cold French team.
So then, how many to we have to get right to not be laughed off the park in July?
Three would be a decent effort, don’t you think?
No matter how wrong we are, we promise not to delete — live and die by the sword.
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