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The 20 most pleasing things to ever happen in football

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1 Danny Drinkwater drinking water

Thank you, world.

2 Swe Den, Den Mark


3 Eidur Gudjohnsen making his debut for Iceland as a substitute for his dad


Just yes.

4 Wycombe scoring two goals without the opposition touching the ball


Jamie Bates put them 1-0 up against Peteborough in 2000 and the ref immediately blew for half-time. Jermaine McSporran then scored nine seconds after the break without a Posh player touching the ball.

5 This Charlton back four

Whereas you can get old fish relatively cheap.

6 Arsene Wenger managing Arsenal


We take it for granted.

Though still not as good as…

7 Wolfgang Wolf managing Wolfsburg



8 The Met Police’s record on January 2, 2014


999! As an added bonus, their star player was Billy Crook. Delicious irony.

9 The scoring streak of this keeper

Keeper Hans-Jorg Butt hit three Champions League goals for three different clubs (Hamburg, Bayer Leverkusen and Bayern Munich).

And they were all against Juventus.

10 Paul Scholes’ goals


He scored in his 100th, 200th, 300th, 400th, 500th and 700th games.

Stop it Scholesy!

(He royally fucked up by not scoring in his 600th though. And the 200th was an own goal. But still.)

11 That day Hartley and Poole scored for Hartlepool


12 The hospital where David Beckham was born is called Whipps Cross


Get it? Because he whipped in crosses…

13 That time Lionel Messi and Diego Godin formed a boy band


Squad goals.

14 John Collins and Collins John both playing for Fulham


And then Fulham’s double Dembele. SET THE SHOWER TO COLD.

15 The age difference between Messi and Ronaldo is 869 days…

Messi and Ronaldo

Which is exactly the same as the age difference between their kids. So basically we’re going to get part two of the greatest sporting rivalry ever.

16 Christian Eriksen’s personalised advertising board

Spelled differently but still good.

17 The eternal battle between and Seedorf and Davids

When they weren’t team-mates at Ajax or for the Netherlands…

18 Chelsea holding the Europa League and Champions League at the same time


(Even if it was for just seven days.)

19 Matt Le Tissier coming off the bench to score the winner in the last ever game at the Dell


It was Le Tiss’ last ever game as well. Goodbyes don’t get more perfect.

20 Michail Antonio marking Antonio Valencia


It’s the simple things in life that keep us going…

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