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SWAN DIVE

Man United demand that Chris Smalling is retrospectively banned for diving

False 9: Man United want Chris Smalling to be punished for his dive against Newcastle

Man United will demand that the FA retrospectively ban Chris Smalling for diving.

Smalling was booked by referee Craig Pawson for diving in the 64th minute, with Matt Ritchie scoring from the resulting free-kick.

But United will still push for the biggest ban possible despite the fact Smalling faced punishment during the game.


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Smalling doing Smalling things

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Smalling doing Smalling things

Unofficial United insider Lee Satchell explained: “We know that Chris got booked but we just don’t think that does it justice.

“People have got less air during the snowboarding at the Winter Olympics. Tom Daley would have been impressed.

“We want the FA to come down hard. If they need to ban him for upwards of ten games then so be it.

It’s a 10.0 from the judges

PA:Press Association
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It’s a 10.0 from the judges

“We want to make it clear that this has nothing to do with the fact that Chris has been doing his best Titus Bramble impression for the last eight years.

“Absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. It didn’t even cross our mind.

“You all know how much Jose Mourinho values the morals of the game. He’d do anything to make sure the game’s image isn’t harmed.

“So yeah, give Chris a 15-match ban and we can all get on wit it.”

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